Showing posts with label wendi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wendi. Show all posts

Friday, January 4, 2008

IMDB it!!!


Jonathan Pryce and Tom Courtenay


If you’ve ever used the above phrase before then you’re not alone. I was recently watching the trailer for the new George Clooney movie, Leatherheads—a cross between O Brother, Where Art Thou? and The Philadelphia Story—when I saw an actor that I had recently seen in something else, but couldn’t quite place him. So, I IMDB’d the movie and found out that it was Jonathan Pryce, who also played Kiera Knightley’s dad in the Pirates movies. I then remembered that I had thought he played another character in that movie The Golden Compass, but I couldn’t find him in the list of the cast. However, I did find another guy that looks and sounds like Jonathan Pryce named Tom Courtenay, who played Newman Noggs in one of my all-time favorite movies, Nicholas Nickleby. Few! Tragedy averted. Has this ever happened to you? Do you have any IMDB stories??


Leatherheads Trailer!!!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Beards: They Grow On You



Are you tired of hearing about the writers’ strike? Or are you just mad that everyone is so selfish and can’t resolve their differences? It makes me so mad that I want to do something about it! So, in honor of those striking I’ve decided to grow a beard just like Conan O’Brien. Sure, it doesn’t really make sense, it’s more because I’m lazy and don’t go to BYU anymore and, well, maybe a certain someone likes how it feels; but it’s on my face and I’m posting a picture of it. So there. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope you enjoy not watching your favorite shows on TV. It’s actually quite liberating. Go out and see the world (Discovery Channel), learn something new (History Channel), follow current events (C-Span), or catch up with an old friend (reruns?). Either way you’re not watching TV, er, TV that you normally watch. Or you can just grow a beard or not shave your legs. Something that demonstrates your frustration with the whole system through some lack of personal hygiene is all that’s really required and appreciated by writers who have no one to write for.

Here's some updates on some of my favorite shows:

24 - None this season! Moving the premier of "Day 7" that was originally going to air January 08. Now could be pushed to next season because they want to air all 24 episodes without a break. via

30 Rock - 1 episodes remaining (eff 12/14)

Big Bang Theory - 0 episodes remaining. Just over half of those originally planned.

Chuck - 1 episode remains (eff 12/13) The final episode will air in 2008

Lost - All eight episodes remaining and planned for February 08. Only half of the originally planned episodes

My Name is Earl - 0 episodes remain(eff 12/14).

The Office - No episodes remain. Production has completely stopped via

Pushing Daisies - 0 episodes remaining (eff 12/13)

Scrubs - 5 episodes remaining (eff 12/10)

Talk/Comedy Shows:

Late Night Shows including Letterman, Leno, Saturday Night Live, The Daily Show, Colbert Report, Craig Ferguson, Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, Real Time with Bill Baher & Carson Daly are all in reruns already. via

The View is continuing on as normal. (phew!!)

UPDATE: THE WEEK OF 12/3, CARSON DALY RESUMED TAPING HIS LATE-NIGHT SHOW ON NBC WITHOUT THE WRITERS. via

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Indie Rock Christmas Songs

Ok, so first of all, this isn't really an Indie Rock Christmas list--I just wanted to throw that in the title for some reason. What is this so-called Indie Rock anyway? The truth is that nobody knows. It's supposed to come from bands that are 'underground' and haven't yet signed a major label. Yet many bands continue to be labeled indie rock even after they sign to a major record label. Check out this definition on Urban Dictionary, it's kind of funny.


Anywho, I know it's a little early for Christmas music, but, hey, Christmas isn't just one day; it's like the entire month of December! Am I right? On that subject: I've always loved Christmas music, but let's get real; sometimes it gets a little old. So, for the last four or five years I've been compiling music from some of my favorite artists. This is a list of some of those precious holiday finds, but it also has some classics that I just think are cool. This is by no means an exhaustive list. In fact, if any of my faithful readers have some more suggestions please send them my way.


P.S. If you want to hear some of these songs, scroll down to the bottom of this page. A lot of these songs are also available on iTunes or wherever you legally download music. If you really want a copy of some of these songs, just let me know--I'd be happy to make you a CD. Remember: "The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!"


The Beatles sing Christmas Time is Here Again


(It Must of been Ol) Santa Claus Harry Connick, Jr.
12.23.95
2000 Miles
Jimmy Eat World
Coldplay
A Great Big Sled The Killers
All I Want for Christmas is You Mariah Carey
Baby, It's Cold Outside Gabe Dixon & Leigh Nash
Baby, It's Cold Outside Leon Redbone/Zooey Deschanel
Believe Josh Groban
Better Days (Acoustic Version) Goo Goo Dolls
Bittersweet Eve Belasana
Blue Christmas Elvis Presley
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) Death Cab For Cutie
Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) U2
Christmas Celebration Weezer
Christmas For Cowboys Jars Of Clay
Christmastime The Smashing Pumpkins
Christmastime Is Here Again The Beatles
Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing Sufjan Stevens
Do They Know It's Christmas Pete Yorn
Do You Hear What I Hear? Copeland
Donde Esta Santa Claus? Guster
Donna & Blitzen Badly Drawn Boy
Frosty The Snowman Fiona Apple
Gabriel's Message Sting
Go Tell It On The Mountain Oh Susanna!
God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen Barenaked Ladies Feat. Sarah McLachlan
God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen Bare Naked Ladies
Green Christmas Bare Naked Ladies
Grown-Up Christmas List Michael Bublé
Happy Christmas (War Is Over) John Lennon
Happy Christmas (War is Over) The Polyphonic Spree
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas Coldplay
Hey Parker, It's Christmas Ryan Adams
Holly Jolly Christmas The Format
Holy, Holy, Holy Sufjan Stevens
I Heard The Bells On Christmas Day Pedro The Lion
I'll Be Home For Christmas Bing Crosby
It Came Upon A Midnight Clear Sixpence None The Richer
Jingle Bells Bing Crosby
Last Christmas Jimmy Eat World
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Lena Horne
Little Saint Nick [Single Version] The Beach Boys
Maybe This Christmas Ron Sexsmith
Merry Christmas Everybody Rooney
Merry Christmas, Baby The Beach Boys
Nutcracker Suite Brian Setzer
O Come O Come Emmanuel Sufjan Stevens
O Holy Night Avril Lavigne & Chantal Kreviazuk
O Holy Night Il Divo
Please Come Home for Christmas Jon Bon Jovi
River Travis
Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer Jack Johnson
Rudy The Be Good Tanyas
Santa Baby Eartha Kitt
Santa Claus Is Coming to Town Eddy Arnold
Santa's Beard The Beach Boys
Sleigh Ride/Santa Claus Party Ferrante & Teicher/Les Baxter/Teicher
Somewhere In My Memory (Voice) John Williams
Song for a Winter's Night Sarah McLachlan
Spotlight On Christmas Rufus Wainwright
St. Patrick's Day John Mayer
Sweet Secret Peace Neil Finn
The Christmas Song Dave Matthews Band
The Christmas Song The Raveonettes
The Christmas Song Weezer
The Holly & the Ivy Mediaeval Baebes
The Only Gift That I Need Dashboard Confessional
The Prayer Josh Groban & Charlotte Church
The Winter Song Eisley
Three Ships Sting
The Christmas Song (Chestnuts
Nat King Cole
We Three Kings Of Orient Are The Beach Boys
What A Year For A New Year Dan Wilson
What Are You Doing New Year's Eve? Harry Connick, Jr.
What Child Is This Matt Wertz
When Christmas Comes to Town Matthew Hall/Meagan Moore
When I Get Home for Christmas Snow Patrol
Winter Wonderland Jason Mraz
Wonderful Christmastime Paul McCartney
Zat You Santa Claus Louis Armstrong

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Publicly Funded Sports Stadiums and Wal-Mart

I was recently reading a news article in the DesNews about the Real Salt Lake soccer stadium. It was interesting because it was really just pointing out the obvious fact that with the debt issued by the county via a 20-year bond that interest would make the stadium price tag considerably higher. I think most people knew that already, and were willing to accept the fact that it would be expensive, but saw it as a welcome economic development opportunity for Sandy. While I am, along with much of Utah, intrigued by sports and believe that having more professional sports in Utah would be great, I can’t help but think that most taxpayers don’t really understand all the nuances of this already done deal. My friend Aaron (a frequent contributor to this blog) and I actually wrote a paper together about this subject almost a year-and-a-half ago that describes some of the issues surrounding the soccer stadium and our take on it. The information is a little dated, but still pertinent.


Finally, this blog really is dedicated to the apolitical entertainment musings that we have, but I can’t help but post something about this as a dedicated sports fan with fiscally responsible leanings. I’m pretty sure Aaron and I are in agreement, but he can post a comment if he feels like he wants to add anything.

Should Tax Dollars Be Spent on the

Real Salt Lake Soccer Stadium?

By:

Jedediah Briggs

and Aaron Smith

The State Legislature has recently approved a bill (HB371) that authorizes all counties in the state to levy a 1.25 percent tax on hotel accommodations to pay for tourism projects. This bill could help pay for part of the Real Salt Lake soccer stadium in Sandy. However, several independent polls already have shown that most valley residents oppose a taxpayer-subsidized soccer stadium. Thus, the county, not the people, will soon decide whether to use the new tax revenue toward funding the stadium, which could cost taxpayers upwards of $45 million dollars. Before the county puts forth the money, there are a few questions to consider:

  • Will the RSL stadium spur economic development in Sandy?
  • What are the benefits for Sandy in having a sports stadium?
  • What are the costs of subsidizing a new soccer stadium?

Will the RSL stadium spur

economic development in Sandy?

Intuitively, a number of people would argue that building a new sports stadium would spur economic development in the surrounding area, but some studies have shown that that simply is not the case. In fact, one study which analyzed the effect of professional sports on local economies in 37 metropolitan areas found that professional sports stadiums did have an impact in an area, but it was, at best, minimal. For example, in 1990, Maryland and Baltimore collected $3.4 billion and $528 million, respectively. For the city, the tax gain from the newly constructed stadium in Baltimore represented only .7% of the tax gain. In addition, personal income in Baltimore was almost $14 billion. Projected earnings for the stadium represent .15% of Baltimore’s total income. Maybe the citizens of Sandy should worry about whether there is an actual impact.

The question could also be raised as to whether sports stadiums increase income per capita in the cities where they are located. The aforementioned study took into account the entire sports environment of the city, including the presence of franchises, franchise entry and departure, stadium construction and renovation, the location of new stadiums and arenas, and the “novelty” effect of a new stadium or arena for professional sports. Of the 37 metropolitan areas in the sample, none of them had a measurable impact on the growth rate of real per capita income in those areas. However, in one case the arrival of a new basketball franchise in a metropolitan area increased real per capita income by about $67, but building a new arena for that basketball team reduced real per capita income by almost $73 in each of the 10 years following the construction of the arena—a net loss of about $6 per person. Much of the lack of economic development can be illustrated through a discussion of the substitution effect.

The substitution effect

It is anticipated that the new arena for Real Salt Lake would be funded in part by public dollars. Usually a large portion of tax dollars goes to public services, such as healthcare, education, and local infrastructure, but in this scenario, the tax payer is being asked to fund a for-profit business. The revenues from the soccer stadium will not be going directly back to the taxpayers of Salt Lake County, but to the owner of the team. There is a difference between giving incentives or tax breaks to a store like Wal-Mart or Ikea to build in your town and actually paying for the store to be built. If valuable tax dollars, which could otherwise be spent on public goods, are spent on funding a sports stadium it could diminish the ability of the local economy to produce other non-sports-related goods and services, which in turn would reduce local income.

There is a difference between giving incentives or tax breaks to a store like Wal-Mart or Ikea to build in your town and actually paying for the store to be built.

The substitution effect also has an influence on private spending. Utah households, like all others, have budgetary constrains, with a limited amount of income. With a new professional sports team in the area, or a new entertainment option, families might spend less on other forms of entertainment, such as dinner, bowling, movies, or shopping. If families spend more money on going to games and less on the local economy then it might have a negative impact on an area. A study of the recently built MCI Center in Washington DC concluded that the arena provided no actual increase in entertainment dollars spent, but rather served as an alternate way for money to be spent. Essentially, there are only so many dollars to go around, and there is simply a transfer of where a person’s money eventually ends up. In the case of the soccer stadium, money goes into the hands of a small number of owners and players who might not reinvest back into the community.

What are the benefits for Sandy in having a sports stadium?

There are some benefits related to having a new sports stadium and team to root for. However, most of the benefits are qualitative in nature, not monetary. There is evidence that cities with sports franchises have a renewed sense of civic pride—it gives the community something to rally behind. There is also the feeling of satisfaction associated with having a professional sports team carry your cities’ name across the country. Furthermore, the arena could be used for other purposes as well, such as social events and concerts. A sports franchise is politically popular. Many people throughout Sandy want a professional soccer team in their midst, which drives political motives to landing a franchise. However, these ideas, again, are rooted in political and social benefits, not monetary policy.

Furthermore, in the Salt Lake County proposal, the land surrounding the stadium will be developed, similar to the area around the Delta Center with the creation of the Gateway Mall. However, the previously aforementioned Washington DC study found that the MCI Center was only part of a major revitalization program. Economic growth in a city such as Salt Lake may have more to do with a rapidly growing population than a soccer franchise.

What are the costs of subsidizing a new soccer stadium?

At present, Real Salt Lake has projected an estimated cost of $145 million for the entire stadium project. Of that total price, Real management has asked that $45 million come from public funds. The public funds, Real management argues, will not be put towards actually stadium construction, but on developing land near the site, including a broadcast studio and hotel.

In order to raise the necessary funds for the stadium, the Utah state legislature has passed a bill that would call for a 1.25% tax on hotel guests. A further analysis of the proposal raises several concerns.

First, there are signs that Salt Lake County is developing a tax rate problem towards hotel use. A 2005 bill that passed through Salt Lake County voters allowed the county to tax hotels in order to expand the Salt Palace Convention Center. The legislation proposed by the state legislature would be the second such tax increase in Salt Lake County in less than a year. One side effect of continually increasing the tax rate on such a limited base (hotel users) would be a decrease in possible hotel use because of over pricing. If the tax rate, combined with the natural increase of hotel prices, becomes too high, there could actually be a decline in hotel activity.

Second, there is a sense that the bill is pitting political entities against each other. In the aforementioned 2005 bill, Salt Lake City put forth $8 million on any future expansion involving Real Salt Lake. That money has already been committed. Salt Lake City is subsidizing a major portion of the development, yet the city may not realize any economic gains, if there are any to be had at all.

Third, there is some concern as to public perception regarding the legislation. As the bill was passed on a state legislative level, local voters in Sandy, and throughout the state, were unable to vote regarding the bill. As citizens continue to lose autonomy on tax issues, there could be political fallout in addition to any economic side effects. Additionally, it may become progressively more difficult to increase taxes on more immediate needs, such as education, health care, and infrastructure.

...Real management has asked that $45 million come from public funds.

Fourth, and perhaps of most concern, the proposal will rely on a user tax. There are disadvantages to this tax. Because the tax is aimed at hotel users, the tax has a limited base. Traditionally, hotel taxes are targeted to tourism development, such as the 2005 bill on the Salt Palace. Additionally, with a user tax, there is an element of unpredictability. The ebbs and flows of tourism can affect the amount of revenue, as tourism is heavily reliant on a healthy economy. Also, tourism can be altered by political climate. The events of September 11th drastically changed tourist based industries. Additionally, natural disasters can also have a great influence on regional tourism. The combination of a limited and unpredictable base could lead to a serious problem in revenue stability.

Risky business

In addition to the concerns with the nature of the tax, there are also some concerns to be raised about Real Salt Lake and Major League Soccer in general.

Since its inception, the league has collectively lost over $200 million. Last year, the Los Angeles Galaxy became the first team to earn a profit in the history of the league, with a total of $200,000. Historically, there is evidence that the league has a revenue problem.

For example, since its inception in 1993, three of the original ten soccer franchises are now defunct. One of those teams, the San Jose Earthquakes, was a two-time league champion and featured several prominent national team members. Despite continually winning and sold-out stadiums in the soccer hot bed of California, the team failed to turn a profit.

Second, Major League Soccer has yet to garner a major television contract. Television contracts are vital to the success of major American sports, such as football, baseball, and basketball. Should Major League Soccer, and Real Salt Lake, hope to ever flourish; they will need to secure a contract. However, securing a TV contract is out of Real Salt Lake and any local government entity’s control. Even with a positive outlook towards the hotel tax revenue, the team may still be unprofitable. The other two now extinct teams, Miami and Tampa Bay, failed to succeed despite being in areas heavily populated by Latinos, the primary demographic of American soccer.

Finally, there is concern about the expenditure of team revenue. In the past, Real Salt Lake has committed to be part of Salt Lake County’s economic growth. However, the actual extent to which Real can participate is very limited. Typically, a major league soccer franchise has as much as sixty percent of revenues tied to player salaries. In addition, the day-to-day operations must also be furnished. There is little evidence to suggest that Real owners will be willing to take whatever revenue remains and put it towards economic development in the county.

Works Cited

Amelia Nielson-Stowell and Nicole Warburton. “Legislation Targets Funding of Stadium.” The Deseret News. 1 Feb. 2006.

Dennis Coates and Brad R. Humphreys, “The Stadium Gambit and Local Economic Development.” Regulation 23 (2000): 23.

Derek P. Jensen. “RSL’s Funding: A Hot Potato for S.L. County, Legislature.” The Salt Lake Tribune. 3 Mar. 2006.

Ed Lazere, “Would a Publicly Financed Stadium Pay Off for DC?” D.C. Fiscal Policy Institute, 2003, pp. 1-9.

Jack Bell. “A League Looks to Grow.” The New York Times. 2 April 2006.

James Quirk and Rodney Fort, Pay Dirt: The Business of Professional Team Sports, Princeton University Press, 1992, pp. 170-171.

Jamie Gadette. “Real Stadium Questions.” Salt Lake City Weekly. 27 Oct. 2005.

Mike Moffit. “Leaky Stadiums.” Stadium Subsidies.” 2006. The New York Times Company. Feb. 1, 2006.



Wednesday, October 24, 2007

I'm Just Saying...

Have you ever wondered what a Libertarian is? How about a communitarian (opposite of a Libertarian)? Apparently, Libertarianism is on the rise and if you want to begin to understand this cultural phenomenon you should read this article. Political pundits feel like Libertarians might become very influential in the future political landscape. In fact, you may already be one. Personally, I hate all these labels that we’ve given one another, but if you’re wondering where you stand politically take this small quiz. You might be surprised—then again maybe not.

So, I’m thinking about moving to Beantown right now? It seems like everyone’s finding their groove there: Red Sox in the World Series; the Pats looking like a team that could go undefeated; Boston College making a run at a national championship; the Celtics looking like a playoff contender for the first time in years, er, decades; and even the native Bostonian, Ben Affleck, seems to have mustered some long-dormant critical praise out of his latest directorial debut.

So, I haven’t been watching much TV lately, but I just wanted to recommend ABC’s ‘Pushing Daises.’ I haven’t even watched a full episode—just 10 min. actually—but I kind of took a liking to it. Bolstered with rave reviews, it’s kind of a quirky and witty dramedy that’s akin to a Coen brothers film (i.e., ‘O Brother, Where Art Thou,’ ‘Raising Arizona,’ and ‘The Hudsucker Proxy’). Here’s the link.

Thanks Hayley for supplying a link to the new Star Trek cast compared to their older counterparts. The similarities are uncanny. Check it out.

Finally, I’m sure you’ve all heard by now that J.K. Rowling announced that Dumbledore is gay. Are you really surprised? It seems like most bespectacled British men who wrap themselves in glittery robes are.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

And now, for your weekly entertainment...





The Office has kind of hit it big recently with Emmy noms and wins, making it onto the cover of Entertainment Weekly, and a slew of the series’ actors taking movie roles. But are you worried that this kind of perfect sitcom can’t last for much longer? Ken Levine offers a cautionary letter to ‘The Office’ actors, writers, et al. All I can say is ‘amen.’

Since the LotR franchise has made like a gajillion dollars and won a cache of Oscars, it seems like making a couple of prequels would be the closest a potential movie could get to a ‘sure thing’ in the film industry. However, the director, Peter Jackson, has been embroiled in a legal battle with New Line (the movie studio that bankrolled the films) over mishandled revenues. New reports have indicated that some sort of détente has taken place between the director and the studio that fast-tracked him to ‘it’ director status. Peter Jackson directing a new Hobbit movie would be awesome, well, it would be ‘precious.’ (Sorry.) Better than these other directors anyway.

So, how ‘bout a ‘Goonies’ sequel? Seems like Corey Feldman is on a role of late, with this and a ‘Lost Boys’ sequel in the works, he can finally leave Corey Haim behind. Watch him break it to his other half that he won’t be in ‘Lost Boys 2.’ Don’t get too sentimental, most of the stuff they do on ‘The Two Coreys’ is scripted.

Have you seen the new Old Navy sweater commercial? I worked at Bold Gravy (heh, heh) for like two years and most of the music that was played continuously over the PA system was so horribly awful that I would get headaches from having to listen to it on a loop all day. But I really like the song from the commercial by a one, Ingrid Michaelson. Take a listen. Also read what she has to say about selling out to GAP, Inc.

One last thing. So, Lindsay Lohan wants to move to Utah, eh? Great, Utah is turning into the backwater for the decrepit, the D-listed, and now the dysfunctional actors. (Yes, that’s alliteration.)

Friday, September 14, 2007

Fashion Corner

I was thinking of how I could become cool recently when I read that Ray- Ban sunglasses are now in style again. Since most of you are obsessed with looking attractive I wanted to share this information. I’d like to think that JedBoy not only keeps you up-to-date on all the cool movies, books, and TV shows, but on all the fashion trends as well. (Duane, I’m talking to you.) But you don’t have to take my word for it, check out this video.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Betting the Farm

Harrison Ford and Sylvester Stallone have a lot in common, both being aged action stars who had trouble playing anything but themselves (advantage Stallone). However, there is a big difference between Stallone’s gamble with “Rocky Balboa” and Ford’s “'Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.”


While “Rocky V” was horrible, the “Jones” trilogy remains in pristine condition. Stallone’s move to redeem himself and the vehicle that made him had very little to lose. Ford’s shot at redemption endangers some of our best memories of him.

I am not saying Ford’s new movie can’t work (though it’s in trouble already with that name), but I am saying he’s got a lot to lose.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

The Long & Winding 'Road'

I’ve been meaning to write something down for the last several months about a book I read for a very prestigious book club (i.e. Wendi and me). The reasoning behind this has to do with the fact that elements of the book got stuck in my head—kind of like when you get water in your ears after swimming. So I’m using my blog as an outlet to jolt my head back and forth in hopes that some of the elements leak from my head and onto the page, thereby escaping my mind. I must foreworn you that by violently shaking my head in such a manner I fear that I’ve left a somewhat confusing splat of brain leakage in the form of text onto the page. You’ve all been warned.

Let me start off by saying that Cormac McCarthy is on a role of late. The Road that was recently published won him the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction, but more importantly (from a financial perspective) McCarthy’s work was endorsed by Oprah herself. It’s a well known fact within the literary realm that getting on Oprah’s booklist, coupled with a TV interview, increases sales of an author’s book by one gajillion copies. (McCarthy is now looking for a small island to buy and retire on.) By the way, another one of his books has recently been turned into a movie, No Country for Old Men, directed by the Coen brothers. Back to the point: why all the fuss surrounding The Road? In a sentence, I would have to say that McCarthy was masterfully able to tap into two of humankind’s most basic motivations: fear and love. Fear permeates from every pore of this book by hijacking the commonly used sci-fi theme of human extinction, which would lead one to assume that it would be the major premise of the book. But I would argue that love is the principal subject matter here and what ultimately separates this sci-fi exercise from that of its counterparts—that is to say, the love found in trust. A trust that is formed and tested by a nameless father and his son, subtlety setting up a very nuanced coming-of-age story as well as an examination of our own morality.

Again, McCarthy succeeds so well in this effort because he takes this worn-out theme of the whole end-of-the-world mythos, but ingeniously stretches it to the outer reaches of human sensibility to a place where the rational behavior of man fades into animalism, thereby turning this tale into one of unfathomable terror. This is a place where time doesn’t even exist anymore because no one’s there to keep it on an almost alien-like planet; a place where survival instinct becomes a mixed blessing as the protagonist travelers slowly grow envious of those who have died and escaped the ethereal nightmare; a place where the characters stand as witnesses for all the prophets’ foretelling of an impending doom; and a place where humans are rounded up and treated as cattle, not because of social injustice, (a staple of sci-fi storytelling) but because some catastrophic conflict or event has left the world without the ability to produce and the only food left for humans is that of their own kind.

Thus, The Road then is a fascinating post-apocalyptic look at a dying world through the eyes of a father and son that shakes you to the very core while imbuing an aura of hellish fear. I felt like I had fallen into someone else’s poetic nightmare of a not-to-distant future that goaded me along with hypnotic ease—I couldn’t put it down. I found the mood extremely dire, the imagery desperate, and the story guiltily addicting (kind of like continuously scratching at an itch when you know you shouldn’t). But what left a lasting impression wasn’t the bleak outlook of a species on the verge of extinction; it was that slow, yet calculated dissection of a bond forged between the father and his only offspring.

The man and his son travel a barren waste-land strewn with rotting reminders of a time when the sun wasn’t blotted out by an omnipresent ash. In an effort to ignite some kind of feeble hope within him, the father continually reminds his son that they are “the good guys”. You see, good guys keep trying and they don’t give up. This hope is steeped in blind faith that humanity still exists somewhere and they’re carrying part of the fire of humanity with them in order to preserve it. Thus, they’re not just surviving for themselves, but they’re surviving for the sake of humankind. Furthermore, they also pride themselves in the fact that they’re moral creatures who haven’t devolved, like the band of marauders who hunt them, to a selfish, cannibalistic way of life.

Still these idealistic notions of survival for the sake of mankind will only take them so far. When sufficiently exhausted of carrying the last vestiges of the human species on their backs, they might choose to end their terrestrial perdition with their own hands. The father keeps a pistol with him that contains exactly two shots. The big question is whether or not he’ll be able to snuff out the life of the only one he has ever brought into the world when the time is necessary. McCarthy writes: “They were their world entire.” The very bond that stills his hand from taking the fatal shot is the same one that keeps them going and has made this requiem of a journey even possible. They have survived not only because of one another, but for one another; consequently developing a bond based upon a foundation of trust.

What’s interesting about trust is that it’s sometimes buoyed up with euphemisms or even white lies. To be completely direct and honest with our fellow human beings all the time is almost impossible, especially—ironically enough—with the people we care about the most. We daily see red flags go up of potential relationship-ending starter questions: What do you think of this, that, or the other? Immediately a response forms in our head of how we actually and truthfully feel, but sometimes these sentiments might offend, belittle, or hurt the questioner. Thus, we “soften the blow” and avoid these crucial questions with vague or indirect comments, thereby avoiding discomfort or even the end of a relationship. Why do we do that? Sure, sometimes we avoid conversations that might lead to further argument, but a lot times we fill that we need to protect others from a painful truth, and most people aren’t sadists. Hence, we lie because we love.

When I think of relationships that I have with family or friends it all comes down to this form of truth: complete honestly blunted with kindness. In other words, I feel like they’ll let me know when I’m screwing up my life, but they’ll do it in a way that salvages some dignity. If trust is the cornerstone of relationships, any relationships—which I think it is—then having a relationship with solely one person would be the absolute test of honesty. What I mean to say is that when there’s only one person that can listen to your indiscretions, your attempts at white lies and half-truths, it would be like telling them to yourself—you know when you lie. This other person would pick up on all your idiosyncratic attempts of “softening the blow” that it would almost become useless to use these tactics, which, over time, might result in a pure unadulterated honesty.

The father and the son’s relationship then becomes the ultimate test study on the issue of trust—they’re the control group. That’s why this book, believe it or not, is a true coming-of-age story, as the boy discovers that his dad isn’t superman and actually lies to him. I think this happens to everyone at some critical point in their life; a hinging moment when you realize that your parents might not know everything. There’s one point in the story when the dad—while trying to calm his son down about a certain ethical dilemma of whether or not they should help someone out—tells him that it’s not easy being the dad because he has to worry about everything. But the son, who’s already seen lapses of trust with his father, says that he’s actually the one who has to worry about everything, not his father. The conversation becomes a revelatory moment as the son, for the first time, begins to openly defy his dad’s logic that had already lost its luster due to the heartfelt “white-lies” that the son was slowly able to see through.

The father was only trying to protect him from his perceived cold reality that if they help other people by sharing their food, they were going to die. Where is the line between moral obligation and survival instinct drawn? Sometimes children are able to bring to light basic truths; the son was able to deconstruct the father’s red herring and the so-called complexity of the situation by reminding his dad that they were the good guys. By trying to extend your life while others die around you flies in the face of the “good guy” logic and the son knew this. Think about it though: At what point do you say to yourself that in order for me to survive I have to let others die? The crack in his father’s own doctrine becomes evident and the son then begins to question whether or not his father really is one of the good guys. To say any more on this part of the book I feel like I’d be cheating anyone who wants to read it. (Hopefully, I didn’t do that already.)

I once read this book about understanding Hopi Native Americans—I really don’t remember much about the book except for this concept of understanding other cultures. This can only be achieved by leaving your own cultural room or sanctuary and entering into another one by hanging your judgments, preconceived notions, and personal beliefs at the door. I think that’s why this book succeeds because it took me out of my own personal concept of morality, life, death, survival, and hope; and placed those tested beliefs in another paradigm. Thus if you read this book try and put yourself into the shoes of the father, son, or both and ask yourself whether you’d be one of the good guys.




B R E T T R A T N E R ' S N O T E S
F O R H I S F I L M V E R S I O N
O F T H E R O A D B Y
C O R M A C M c C A R T H Y .

BY WENDY MOLYNEUX

- - - -

Possibilities to play the father/son duo:

  • Brad Pitt and Maddox Jolie-Pitt. If so, have them ride around on ATVs instead of walking. Walking is boring.
  • Will Smith and Jaden Smith. Loved them together in Pursuit of Happyness. Maybe talk to Will about doing a hot soundtrack. Would Will's wife play movie wife? Remember to ask. Also, in book, wife is dead. Rewrite this. Have her be alive.
  • Father needs "buddy." See if Jackie Chan is available. If not, maybe Andy Dick?
  • If we switch the father/son to mother/daughter, get Angelina and Shiloh. Keep ATVs.

In book, we don't find out how the world ended. Must show in movie version. Possible scenarios:

  • Aliens
  • Robots
  • Alien robots
  • Girls in bikinis accidentally blow up nuclear power station by hitting self-destruct button with their big, round butts

If we go with robots as destroyers of Earth, robots should still be chasing the people. Also, maybe change name from The Road to The Robots.

If we decide to rewrite as comedy, see if Sandler is available for May production start.

Can this movie make $100 million? No. It can make $200 million.

Switch shopping cart to Hummer or Bentley. (Which is more apocalyptic? Look on Internet.)

When the father and son discover the boat, boat should be loaded with machine guns and hand grenades. Also, smart sharks.

In book, they say "carrying the fire" and it's some kind of abstract thing about carrying the spirit of humanity around in a time of hopelessness. Afraid people will not get. What if "fire" is a secret weapon that will restore atmosphere and kill the robots? Or it turns out at the end that boy can shoot fire out of eyes and mouth? He's like a messiah guy, but a fire-shooting-eyes messiah guy.

Will need good sound bites for trailer. Maybe at one point son is sad about something stupid and father says, "It's not the end of the world!" Then son gives him ironic look. Love it.

Maybe they are not father and son, but one is a cop and the other is a martial-arts expert?

Everything takes place in Miami?

Thursday, August 30, 2007

'The Office' Summer Vacation



Andy: I am a great interviewee. Why? Because I have something no one else has: my brain. Which I use to my advantage, when advantageous.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Friday, August 10, 2007

Monday, July 16, 2007

Applying String Theory to Album Reviews

While Jed continues to post Kevin Costner's America in hopes of winning an Ansel Adams Award, I turn your attention for a brief moment to the world of quantum mechanics, string theory, and the world of relativity.

I recently tried to dive into a book by Brain Greene (not the dude from 90210) about the universe. People, my mind was blown in the acknowledgements. I simply wasn't ready for that.

So, I took a flying dive into Stephen Hawking's illustrated A Briefer History of Time. While I was hoping for an entirely illustrated, watered down explanation of gravity, there were some pictures of Stephen Hawking using the powers of his mind to attract Marilyn Monroe (seriously), because Stephen Hawking could totally use his mind to control you. He's that smart, people.

In the book, there is some discussion of Newton's Principia Mathematica. Newton was so awesome that he invented calculus to explain the universe, which field of math eventually led to the downfall of so many high school seniors across the land. Thanks, Isaac, for ruining my grades.


However, by the power of Stehpen Hawking's awesome mind, I am now as much as 3% smarter. Apparently, just by reading the book, Mr. Hawking replicated his DNA into my
cerebrum.

What does this have to do with Album reviews, as the title of the post says?

I have long despised the pomposity of album reviews. They sicken me. Whenever I read one, it's like the author is an English literature graduate student that mixed the album review with their thesis on the transcendentalist civil disobedience of the newest Van Halen album. Actually, a "serious" music reviewer, such as anyone that writes for that Idolator website would never listen to Van Halen. Van Halen is to awesome for that. What sickens me more about album reviews is a) the reviewer is trying sooooooo hard to sound smart, which usually turns into underhanded insults about how their music is better than yours and b) if the music they reviewed was that good, why aren't more people listening?

Music is very subjective. You, by now, are aware that I think Van Halen is awesome. While this is the case for me, you might be looking at your thesaurus right now, looking up how many ways you can say "suck" to describe how you feel about Van Halen.


Thus, I have devised a new equation which reduces album reviews to relativity within the gravity of a bands influence.

Here's how the equation works. An album reviewer takes the number of songs listened through divided by the number of total songs to arrive at the percentile score of the album. Essentially, you're doing the same thing your high school calculus teacher would do when grading your test -- number correct/number possible= percent score. So, you're saying number of good songs on one album out of the entire album listing. This is your rating relative to you.

Here's an example: The Nine Inch Nails album Broken has 99 tracks. I dislike all 99 tracks, so the album gets a Grand Canyon size zero percent. Not only that, the album gets negative points for 99 tracks, which gives my stereo a nervous breakdown counting through. So, I rate Broken as negative percent, which, in Newton's world, is not possible.

So, to honor Mr. Newton and the mind prowess of Hawking, I present the caveat of the equation -- a band's rating would only be applied within the "gravitational pull" of that bands universe. I don't subscribe to the gravitational pull of the NIN universe, therefore my score doesn't count, as I don't like NIN.

When rating an album, the question "Do I like this band?" must be asked. If no, simply skip ahead from your rating, as you aren't in the "gravity" of that band. Thus, a "yes, I like this band"allows you to score, a "no, hearing this band is like being being stuck in hell" gets you a move along please.

Now, Part Two of the equation -- calculating the "gravity" of a band. How to calculate gravity:

Total of all percentile scores divided by number total number of "yes" raters. Essentially, like your calculus teacher, you're going to find the "average" score. So, the higher the collective or "average" score, the higher the pull.

Now, the final part -- as Newton so aptly calculated, the bigger the mass of the object, the bigger the pull of the object. Thus, we need to calculate the "mass"of an object. Certainly, one must realize that in the music universe, there are those that have a cosmic pull and luminosity whatever it is in the center of the Milky Way that everything else seems to revolve around, and there are those that slowly float around somewhere around the rim of the universe, burning so low and so dull that no one notices but obnoxious album reviewers.

To calculate the mass of a band, we find the average of the averages for a band-- meaning that you total the number of collective scores for one band, then divide by the number of albums. For example, Public Enemy has fourteen albums. I add up the scores from each of the albums, then divide by fourteen. Since Public Enemy is mind-blowingly, in yo' face awesome, Public Enemy's "mass" is 100. So, Public enemy is a class-O, superhot and "o"-so luminous star.


Monday, June 25, 2007

Real Men Wear 'Guyliner'

Are you a real man? Do you wear eyeliner? I hadn't noticed when it first came out, but one of the taglines for Pirates of the Caribbean has been "Real men wear eyeliner." The phrase is obviously trying to capitalize on the suddenly new and bizarre trend of male eyeliner, which Jack Sparrow dons in all of the Pirate flicks. Even Keith Richards, who plays Sparrow's father, went home with six extra little sticks of the dark paste because he liked it so much.

This fad isn't exclusive to the swashbuckling franchise, Tobey Maguire could be found wearing it in the latest installment of Spider-Man 3. Also, bands such as My Chemical Romance, Panic! At the Disco, Green Day, 30 Second to Mars, Fall Out Boy, and The Killers all darken their eyes. This male eyeliner was recently dubbed guyliner to help add to its chic in the hopes of catering to a younger male, and assuredly more emo, demographic. Collen Mastony noted: "Not since Alice Cooper got creative with kohl and David Bowie had fun with eye shadow during the colorful days of glam rock, have so many rock stars and leading men become enamored with the wonders of the cosmetics aisle."

Is there even a market for this stuff? Actually, $4.8 million was spent on male grooming products in the U.S. last year, which is up 7 percent from the previous year and 42 percent since 2001. Still it's hard to imagine male cosmetics really taking hold in Middle America, but even the unanimously-voted manliest of men, Bruce Willis, has allegedly admitted to wearing a little makeup in his own movies. When his manliness was recently questioned by FoxNews, Bruce shot back, "Look, real men should be judged by the content of their character and not the color of their cosmetics!" In related news, 20th Century Fox is now considering this supposedly oft-repeated quote by Willis as their tagline for the next Die Hard movie: Live Free or Dye It.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Captain's Blog

Yesterday I was talking to my dad, along with some of my siblings, about his life in high school. He revealed to us that he was somewhat of a nerd, or as he put it; “introverted.” I don’t think any of were surprised by this comment knowing that my dad can regularly be found with book in hand, carries multiple pens in his shirt pockets (including a highlighter), and adores Star Trek. Knowing the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, I’ve reluctantly decided to accept my nerdiness, which can be manifest through my excitement level for the new Star Trek movie. The script has just been finished and they’re trying to rejuvenate the franchise by going back to the beginning when James T. Kirk and Mr. Spock meet at Starfleet Academy and go on their first mission. J.J. Abrams (Lost, Alias, Mission Impossible III) is set to produce and direct the eleventh film in the series, which leaves me no doubt that it’s going to be good. Casting rumors include Matt Damon and Adrien Brody as Kirk and Spock respectively. I’ll probably be there opening night with my fellow nerdlings along with my nerd father.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Generation Ethan Hawke

Ethan Hawke’s new movie “The Hottest State,” (which he directed, produced, stars in, and adapted from the book he wrote) is opening this summer, but what I’m probably more excited about is the soundtrack, which includes Norah Jones, Cat Power, and Bright Eyes. And in the spirit of Ethan Hawkishness (the Generation X poster boy) I’ve posted my top five Ethan Hawke quotes (in chronological order):

Todd Anderson: [standing on his desk] Oh captain, my captain. – Dead Poets Society

Troy: There's no point to any of this. It's all just a... a random lottery of meaningless tragedy and a series of near escapes. So I take pleasure in the details. You know... a quarter-pounder with cheese, those are good, the sky about ten minutes before it starts to rain, the moment where your laughter becomes a cackle... and I sit back and I smoke my Camel Straights and I ride my own melt. – Reality Bites

Jesse: You know what's the worst thing about somebody breaking up with you? Is when you remember how little you thought about the people you broke up with and you realize that is how little they're thinking of you. You know, you'd like to think you're both in all this pain but they're just like 'Hey, I'm glad you're gone'. – Before Sunrise

Vincent: There's no gene for fate. - Gattaca

Jesse: I heard this story once about when the Germans were occupying Paris and they had to retreat back. They wired Notre Dame to blow, but they had to leave one guy in charge of hitting the switch. And the guy, the soldier, he couldn't do it. You know, he just sat there, knocked out by how beautiful the place was. And then when the allied troops came in, they found all the explosives just lying there and the switch unturned, and they found the same thing at Sacre Couer, Eiffel Tower. Couple other places I think...
Celine: Is that true?
Jesse: I don't know. I always liked the story, though. – Before Sunset


**If you have any more quotes, please share.

Sunday, May 20, 2007

To Everything there is a Season



I thoroughly enjoyed the season finale of The Office. Of course, it doesn’t top last year’s Season Two cliffhanger that ended in a dramatic kiss, but it was still good. This episode really left everything up in the air: Who really got the corporate job? What did Jim mean by saying ‘it’s a date’? Was Karen left high and dry in NYC? One thing I am certain of though was that I love watching hour-long episodes of The Office. There are so many great characters on this show, that’s it’s impossible to give them adequate screen time in the current half-hour format. Ah, c'est la vie!

Let me start with the end. How classic was it to see Ryan probably getting the job in NYC in the last little segment that I always seem to skip on my TiVo? Ryan becoming Michael’s boss would create a lot of uncomfortably funny plots next year. It’s interesting that B.J. Novack, (aka Ryan) a writer on the show, would essentially give himself less screen time. Maybe the producers felt that the already packed-with-characters sitcom would benefit from better actors taking a more prominent role, like Ed Helms (Andy) for instance. Ryan the Temp character isn’t that good to begin with anyway, it’s sort of a one-note, smarmy kid. He’s had some good lines, and I love his interactions with Kelly, but overall I’d rather watch the Andy/Dwight power trip conversations over the Ryan/Kelly relationship quarrels.

But the conversation at the end of the episode isn’t a guarantee that Ryan actually got the job. In fact, one of my friends at work has hypothesized that Karen could have gotten the job at corporate and Ryan might have gotten a different job, such as Jan’s assistant. Remember the line Jan told her assistant before she left about following your dreams and not to give up on the rock band? It’s just a thought. But also, just because Ryan has an MBA doesn’t really make him qualified for such a high position, especially since he has never even made a sale—maybe those MBAs are a little more valuable than I had thought. However, if Karen were to get the job that would produce an interesting dynamic to the show, as she would become not only Michael’s boss, but Jim’s superior. This of course all assumes that Karen’s character would be coming back next year.

I’ve also read some internet rumors that have said that Rashida Jones (Karen) would come back to the show contingent on whether or not her new sitcom was picked up on Fox. The sitcom has actually been picked up by the network, so her character might be axed all together. But still we’re gonna need some resolution to the Jim/Karen relationship, so I’m thinking she’ll at least be back for some guest appearances at the very least.

Speaking of relationships, who would have thought that the most dysfunctional and somewhat funny, but mostly creepy couple to watch this season has been Michael and Jan. From the first season Jan has always seemed like a very strong-minded corporate individual, and her lust for Michael was something of a fluke. The CFO might have given us an insight into her neurotic character, by painting her as an undependable basket case, furthered by her recent, er, “enhancement”. In pure double entendre genius I love how they entitled this episode “The Job”. I completely lost it when Michael explained why he was getting back together with Jan by telling Pam, “Your advice was good, but Jan’s was bigger.” Of course, Michael might be getting a little more than he bargained for by tenuously inviting Jan to move in with him—which completely depends on whether he can reneg on his eBay sale of his condo (that’ll probably hurt his rating).

Then there was Dwight who had seemingly consolidated power without using the ancient Roman methods and made Andy his number two. I, too, have often thought that I would like to have Jack Bauer as a second in command of my life, if only he weren’t unavailable, fictional and overqualified. The introduction of the Shrute bucks was vintage Michael incompetence, but only meaner. The banter that followed was some of the best wordplay of the season as Dwight and Stanley haggled over the ratio of Stanley nickels and Schrute bucks, which happens to be the same as unicorns to leprechauns.

But the dramatic lifeblood of the show rested on a golden yogurt lid (symbolizing past flirtations) and a small note, which brought the always cool Jim to stammer in his interview and then—as we’re led to believe—race back to ask Pam on “a date”. Of course, we’re not exactly sure what is meant by the ambiguous invitation, but watching Pam’s face look at the camera after and give a smile of joy and nervousness is pure Emmy material that brought a lump to my throat. It seemed like Pam had found herself with her new independence and confidence, and right before Jim came in she said that it hadn’t worked out because of timing. I’ve heard this explanation before from someone trying to get out of a relationship with me, but it’s also been a real issue that I’ve confronted with potential relationships. In Pam’s case she wasn’t skirting the issue or beating about the bush, she was, and maybe for the first time, being completely honest with herself. Even if two people have a connection, one of them might be engaged, or even dating someone else in the office, which could result in a possible relationship that never materializes. With Jim and Pam the feelings between them were obvious and even manifest to the viewer through Lostesque flashbacks, when Jim noted that even though he was back, he felt like he wasn’t really back. I think this means that he’s never really got back to the place in his heart where he fell in love with Pam. To protect himself he had buried those painful feelings deep down through a relationship with Karen. Only when Pam was able to meet him at the same place of vulnerability and humility, by publicly announcing that she had broken up her wedding for Jim, could he begin to really come back to a place of yogurt lid medals, secret alliances for office pranks, and flirtatious glances of validation.

Thus, timing had been the culprit to the inception of their relationship previously, but in TV land anything can happen. So, we’re left to ponder over the summer whether Jim and Pam are finally getting together after three seasons. But what kind of Office would a Jam relationship result in? I hope the writers aren’t foolish enough to take us down a road of on-and-off-again-soap-opera relationships a lá Ross and Rachel. I should hope not. The Office has too much realism gushing from its creative center to pursue something so uninspired, but maybe I’m giving the writers too much credit. In fact, a relationship at the office would be interesting and could be fun between Jim and Pam, coming up with different ways to annoy Dwight and Andy and giving each other playful looks of acknowledgement every time Michael opens his mouth. But, whatever kind of Office season four turns out to be, one thing for sure is that they’ll be a lot of them, as NBC has asked for an unprecedented 30 episodes to be made. So, sit back, relax, and have a good summer. I’ll see you all next year to enjoy this amazing sitcom with me, in fact, “it’s a date.”

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